Feelin' the love

Do you ever have those days when your precious offspring are just at each other’s throats? It seems like they just get through one problem and they are at it again? It’s like there is a breakdown in the sibling system and they just can’t move past it. I am going to share one of our favorite ways to help ‘em snap out of it. Maybe you can give it a try sometime when you are about to pull your hair out. Or theirs.

Protecting sibling relationships and showing respect for each other is pretty high on the list of things we expect from our kids. So when there is continuous bickering or snotty attitudes going on between them, we sometimes pull the offenders aside for a little activity. We all sit down together and each child is told to come up with 3 things they admire about the other kid. Then they take turns telling us what those things are.

The first one is hard.

There is eye-rolling and veins popping out on foreheads as they rack their brains trying to figure out if there is anything. at. all. they can think of. After all, who wants to point out something good about a person you are mad at?

But after they get that first compliment out, things start to soften up. All of a sudden, the walls start to crumble. You see the kids remembering what they actually like about each other. You see them joining forces to act like we are crazy for making them do this. You see them feeling empowered by the compliment from the other. The words heal the hurt. They revive the friendship. It’s amazing how this activity can turn things around. They almost always leave as buddies.

And they get one more lesson in the power of words.