The wall

Ever feel like God is trying to tell you something? I put these letters on my entry windowsill. At the time, it was because I wanted our family to be reminded of God’s grace as we leave our home to go out into the world.

I didn’t realize that God was about to reveal that he was wanting a little more from me.

It caught me off guard when I walked through the house and noticed this on the wall.

Then I noticed I could also see it from the kitchen.

And when I came downstairs one night in the dark.

He’s God. He knows I’m hardheaded. He knows I have to slowly process. He was pulling me in. He was Evan Almighty-ing me.


After close to thirty years of Christianity, it wasn’t until a few years ago that I began to grasp the concept of grace. I knew what it was. But I didn’t accept it. Grace by definition is unmerited favor. The idea that I didn’t need to earn this unconditional acceptance from God was such a hard concept for me. To say my walk down this grace path has been life-changing would be an understatement.

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Just as I began to accept God’s grace as a constant, He started digging into another area of grace in my life. My parenting.

Lately I’ve been getting hit with the grace concept everywhere I turn. In books I pick up. In conversations I have. In speakers I hear. I’ve started to realize that although I try to be easygoing and loving, I am often lacking in grace with my family.

I think it is so easy to get sucked into the overwhelming job of training our kids in the way they should go, and forget to grant them unmerited favor. Maybe it’s because we fear that they will think it is ok to screw up all the time. Or maybe we are afraid that they won’t be able to discern right from wrong. I’m not sure what the root of it is, or why we think nagging will ever in a million years produce good.

God spent years settling me into his comforting haven of grace, where when I rebel, I no longer feel that He is wagging his finger at me. Instead I feel him gently saying "Come on, get back up and try again and know that I am behind you no matter how long it takes you to get it right."

So I am now headed down a new path of grace.

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The path of offering it fully.

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And fully does not mean occasionally.

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Yikes.

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I don’t want to be the mom that falls into the trap of only being a coach and misses the relationships that grace can grow. I don’t want my children to ever change because of fear of condemnation. I want them to desire to get things right because they are being guided lovingly. I want them to always feel the truth, that I am behind them, supporting them and loving them no matter how long it takes them to get it. I want them to be in a safe place of grace, free to grow and become what God wants them to be.

I’m not changing my standards, but it’s time to make some changes to my approach sometimes. I mean, hello, He wrote it on my wall.